“I have a vision of myself as Icarus flying too close to the sun and crashing and burning as a result”

Fifty Shades of Grey, pg 53 l8



DO NOT EXPECT ANYTHING FROM THIS POST /caps lock out of my control/ I don’t have any idea to post something on this blank space . . . (oh, post Ms. Swift’s Blank Space, then XD) ayaya, It’s 2015 and hell-o I haven’t post anything (particularly my origin post, not something I reblogged from another place)! So yeah, here we go, think im going to post some curcol here so #yaudah

  1. I’M STARTING TO READ FIFTY SHADES OF GREY (yang mana ini adalah buku e satu-satunya yang saya miliki), karena . . . yes bcs I already have that “courage” -_- yaaaa Fifty Shades of Grey, siapa yang gak tau sih an E book(too risk to write the rests, I am an underage! although I would be having my 17 this year.)  I’m on the way chapter eleven, pg 165. Gak bisa bilang ini seru, atau mengerikan, atau apalah, mungkin saya pernah bilang kalau buku ini, not my cup of tea. But I can’t resist saying this book tastes ecstatic. Yup, Grey’s the ecstasy I have found there. Dan, I have no resistance to say that I have found somebody with Grey’s character on him. Serem. (gak juga sih, but I found the dominant on him, pushed me down as his submissive. Kayak seme uke gitu lah.)
  2. REGRET ALWAYS COMES LATER. Kenapa saya baru dengerin Epik High sekarang… hah?? yes I found pleasure of drowning myself to Epik High’s Shoebox album, dan saya yang enggak terlalu into ke hallyu aka Korean wave, yaampun this taste better than any Korean rap musician I have ever known.
  3. OSK SEBENTAR LAGI. Kabar-kabar burungnya sih katanya pertengahan februari, ada yang bilang awal februari, yang bilang akhir januari juga ada kok . . .
  4. COME BACK HOME ONEGAISHIMASU. CAN’T WAIT FOR THE NEXT LECTURES. May the luckiness on you. Good luck for the exam! Sincerely, your kouhai-who-knew-too-much-and-really-want-to-know-about-everything.

Sekian curcol-nya. I have to go~ home works are waiting to do.


The risky tango between unhappiness and happiness
My life is poetry
I just breathe and it’s Rimbaud
Even suffering can be a journey when you enjoy it
Spent a season in hell but I only got a tan
I’m good
I smile for my dear mama
I look exactly like my dad
So if I cry, I’m afraid I would see him crying
And I smile for my dad
So no one will ever be hurt over my tears again
Who cares if I can’t fly like before?
I survived it
I was lifted up then came down
What built up wasn’t stress but mileage
The world said, “The show’s over”
With cold smiles and sneers
Everyone pretending they can’t hear me
And I came through
Even the hate from my enemies who are still fired up
Is fuel for my art
So fuck you and thank you
Curtain call
Under my feet aren’t roses but arrows
But I’ll never fall

I didn’t realize that the show was over
No, I didn’t realize that the show was over
I didn’t realize that the show was over
No, I didn’t realize that the show was over

As time goes by,
I only let out sighs
Always blaming the heavens
Pounding the floor in regret
Isn’t that why I couldn’t fly or walk?
Time passed and my vision kept walking in place
It’s alright
I may be standing still but my heart is always beating
Just follow me and jump
Before even my heart stops
I used to breathe in the upper air
Floating above the clouds
But was it already time to open my parachute?
They saw “Fevers End” blossoming and applauded
But they took away one-third of my life
So I told them, “Just watch, all of you”
All you fuckers who stepped on us, thinking we were corpses, fuck you
We back

I didn’t realize that the show was over.
Don’t you tell me that it’s over.
No, I didn’t realize that the show was over.
Look at me now. You know that I’m here to stay.
I didn’t realize that the show was over.
Thank you. It was nice to know ya.
No, I didn’t realize that the show was over.
The show goes on.